10 Ways To Build A Healthy Relationship
No one decides to be alone; it is in human nature to want to be with someone because some things such as the feeling of affection you can only get from other people. On the other hand, being in a relationship does not guarantee happiness. It’s the people in the relationship that make the relationship happy.
1. Learn to listen and understand
Most of us are either talking or waiting for our turn to talk. This doesn’t make for good conversation or strong relationships. When talking to someone, hear them out without judgment or interruption. Focus on what’s being said and do your best to understand.
2. Think before acting on emotion
In all honesty your first emotional reaction does not always reflect how I really feel about something. When you are calm and are thinking clearly, you may realise that you overreacted.
3. Learn to be trusting
We often find it hard to trust because we’ve been hurt in the past. People coming out of romantic relationships are sceptical of opening their hearts again. But the truth is, ALL relationships require trust. You can never know whether someone’s going to hurt you or not because there are no guarantees in life.
4. Avoid negativity
To break the negative pattern of conflict in your relationship, next time things get heated, let your partner know what’s going on with you by saying: “I can see this issue is important to you. I’m feeling too angry to discuss it right now, though, so let’s come back to it once we’ve cooled off.”This will ensure that you never act out of emotion.
5. Be honest about your expectations
We often set ourselves up for disappointment. We fail to tell others what we want and then blame them for not reading our minds. When you want something, be honest about it. Expressing your desires might feel uncomfortable, but it gives the other person the opportunity to give you what you really want.
6. Identify common goals
The aim is for both of you to share what you want your life to be about, where you want to end up and what these things mean to you. Look for anything that’s common between the two of you and talk about ways to work toward that aspiration together.
7. Give
Humans are selfish by nature. “What’s in it for me?” is the first question we ask ourselves. Make people feel good by giving them your undivided attention; make time for those who really matter. Being giving is the best way to be appreciated by the people around you.
8.Share power
While hoarding power may have worked for you in your career, this strategy will backfire in your relationship because your girlfriend will end up feeling like her opinions don’t matter and you don’t value her opinions. Develop a more accepting attitude toward compromise.
9. You don’t always have to be right
Nobody likes being told what to do. Unless a person asks for advice, they want to be understood, not lectured. When dealing with other people, let go of the need to be right. Don’t force your opinion on other people. Don’t be pushy, self-righteous and judgmental no matter how you might feel. Even when you think you’re right; understand that different people have different opinions.
10. Appreciate each other
If you’re not sure where to start, a good place is by giving each other daily compliments. Tell her she looks hot or thank her for organizational abilities when she reminds you to call your mother. The only rule is to make sure that you genuinely mean what you say.
Mbali Radebe
