10 Subtle Signs You’re In a Toxic Relationship

There’s nothing wrong with admitting a relationship has run its course. Even if you can’t conceptualize your life without that person, with time and distance, you’ll be able to see the relationship for what it was: toxic as hell.

1. Passive aggression

The whole “I hate it when you do that, but I’m just gonna keep it to myself and throw you shady little side glances” thing is unnecessary.

Once you’re not comfortable being direct with your SO, you’ve lost that bond on which your relationship was initially built.

2. Jealousy and the blame game

We’re all only human, so jealousy will happen on some level. But, excessive jealousy is never okay. If you don’t have trust in a relationship, you literally have nothing worth holding on to.

3. Criticism and contempt

No one is perfect, and the closer you become with someone, the more conspicuous his or her imperfections will become. There is nothing wrong with criticism that comes from a positive place.

When criticism is used as a channel to express contempt or disdain for someone else, it can make the other person feel unvalued and worthless. It’s hard for a relationship to come back from that.

4. Arguing without communicating

We all know that yelling over each other won’t get you anywhere.

It’s natural to get upset and argue, but if there’s no exchange of communication and neither party conveys why he or she feels how he or she does, nothing will be solved.

5. Negative energy

Feeling uncomfortable or tense around someone is just your body reacting to the negative energy surrounding the two of you.

Negativity can drain you mentally, physically and emotionally. We’re forced to deal with this stuff, but your SO should be a reprieve from that type of stress.

6. Avoiding each other

At the bare minimum, you should be able to tolerate your SO’s presence. If you can’t even bring yourself to be around him or her, you should really just call it quits.

7. You’re not yourself

Change will happen regardless. When you’re in a relationship, even if you both change, you should be going in the same direction.

If your relationship changes you, it should only make you a better version of yourself. If you feel like you’re losing yourself or you don’t recognize who you are anymore, it’s not healthy.

8. Feeling like there’s no point

There is a difference between staying in a relationship because you’re comfortable and staying because you truly want to be there.

If you feel like your relationship isn’t going anywhere, why waste the time? That’s time you’ll look back on with regret, but that you’ll never be able to relive.

9. You only think about making him or her happy

Once you hit your 20s, relationships are a trial run for marriage. You should be able to see potential in spending the rest of your life with your significant other because if not, what’s the point?

You should want to make your SO happy, but it should be a two-way street. Your happiness should mean his or her happiness and vice versa.

If you’re constantly trying to make them happy, but you’re not getting anything in return, then something in the cycle is disjointed. Happiness should be mutual.

10. You can’t seem to do anything right

Once you get to the point where you feel like everything you do upsets him or annoys her, and you’re tiptoeing around in your own relationship, you need to understand that you aren’t the problem.