5 Mistakes People Do After Getting Dumped

Getting dumped can be a very difficult experience. We’ve all been there and know that it’s hard to get back to being your normal self after getting dumped.If you find yourself thinking and acting in uncharacteristic ways because of the pain we feel, trust us, you are not alone! Here are five mistakes you should totally avoid after getting the red card, who know, your ex might want to get back with you.

1. Begging your ex

This is a very common thing for people to do because they are grief-stricken and cannot imagine their life without their ex. You have to start to think about things from their perspective though. How will it look to them if you start asking to constantly give it another try? If you start crying and trying to guilt trip them into things it will only make them resent you even more and they will start to see you as pathetic.

2. Speaking badly about your ex

This is a time when you are at your weakest emotionally and so many things will be going on in your mind that it is easy to lose sense of reality sometimes. Accept that this is a stage that you must go through after your break up, but deal with it in a mature way and do not allow your ex to see that you are taking it badly.

3. Staying friends

When you are heartbroken, and can’t stand the idea of losing this person in your life, a comforting idea in your break-up may be to agree to stay friends.  You are wrong.  Your judgment is clouded because your emotions are running high (whether you are showing them or not) and you think you’re the kinda dude who can totally handle watching movies on the couch without making out or hearing about who she’s dating next…you’re on a one way ride to Torture Town, my friend.  If you think you sound like a jerk for saying, “No” on the stay friend request, just offer that you need time and if you both feel like you’d still like to be friends in a few months, revisit the option.

4. Holding in emotions

Dudes especially are good at keeping their emotions inside.  If you are bottling up your feelings of anger, grief, loneliness, etc., it’s only going to hurt you more.  Calling one of your best friends or a close family member whom you know will not judge you can be really worth your while.  Plus people who love you want to help you through tough times, so don’t be afraid to lean on someone.  If you still aren’t getting what you need, seeing a therapist is a totally great and totally cool thing to do as well.  Getting a professional involved with a 3rd party perspective can also help you learn how to avoid getting into another whack relationship- double win.

5. Stalking the ex

This is a very common method that people use after they have been dumped to keep an eye on what their ex is doing and how they are feeling after the break up. It is natural to want to know what they are up to and who they are doing it with, after all your ex was a huge part of your life and they suddenly aren’t there anymore. What you have to bear in mind is that this will be doing you no good whatsoever. It can quickly become an obsession and take over every part of your life.